THE NEW TESTAMENT TEACHING
By B Ward Powers
This book is based on research into these matters for which Ward Powers
was awarded the Ph.D. of the
CONTENTS
1.
Marriage
in the Purposes of God
2.
Christ’s
Detailed Teaching About Marriage (Mt 19:1-12)
3.
What
Marriage I All About
4.
How
To Be A Sexual Christian
5.
The
Rights And Wrongs Of Sex
6.
The
Real Role of Sex In Marriage (1 Corinthians 7:1-5)
7.
Varieties
Of Sexual Behaviour – The Moral Question
8.
Sex
and Love
9.
Being
Single And Getting Married
10.
Family
Life
11.
Birth
Control Issues
12.
When
A Marriage Turns Sour
13.
Divorce
And Marriage Break-up
14.
Remarriage
After Divorce
15.
In
Conclusion
Appendix A.
Animal Sex
Appendix B.
Birth Control and World Population
Appendix C.
Christian Attitudes To Sex Throughout History
Appendix D.
Differences In The Interpretation Of Biblical Material
Appendix E.
Evaluation of Customary Marriage and Polygamy
Indices and
Bibliography
Dr Powers
has identified the eleven different and mutually exclusive views about divorce
and remarriage which are (or have been) held in the church. He examines each of
these in relation to the Scriptures, and looks at the question of how so many
teachers can look at the same passages in the Bible and come to so many
different conclusions as to what they mean.
SAMPLE
TOPICS
Dr Powers
provides below some brief notes about a small selection of the issues discussed
in this book – click a question or topic to move directly to a discussion of
particular interest to you:
The purpose of God in how he created mankind
The nature of marriage, as taught in the Bible
The eleven views about divorce and
remarriage
Law and Grace in relation to divorce
The question of grounds for divorce
Divorce: the non-existent exception
Making your wife an adulteress: Jesus’s
teaching
Did Jesus teach that it is adultery for a divorcee to remarry?
The lesser of two evils when bound to a spouse
When is it permissible for you to cut off your leg?
How long must a divorcee remain unmarried?
Can a Christian divorcee ever remarry? When?
Should a divorcee ever remarry in church? Why?
HOW TO
PURCHASE THIS BOOK
You can
choose any one of five ways to order and pay for this book:
2.
(Email ward@bwardpowers.info with credit card
information (insecure)
3.
Send
an
Australian cheque for $AUD33.00 to Jordan Books, 259A
PETERSHAM NSW 2049
4. Send a
5.
Send
a British cheque for £Stg15 to a bank in
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THE
PURPOSE OF GOD IN HOW HE CREATED MANKIND
By B Ward Powers
God created
us male and female (Genesis 1:27) so that we could participate in the
relationship of marriage. Marriage is instituted by God for the blessing and
enrichment of human life upon earth. It is to be the sphere within which the
next generation is born and raised, of course (Genesis 1:28), but the Bible
says far more about the purposes of marriage than this alone.
The first
purpose of God for marriage was companionship. After God set Adam in the Garden
he said (Genesis 2:18), “It is not good for a man to be alone”, and created Eve
to be a companion for him. So also Malachi 2:14 (NRSV) says of a wife, “She is
your companion”. And the husband similarly is to be companion for the wife. We
will have many friends and companions in our lives, of course, but God’s
intention is that your spouse is to be your companion in a very special way:
someone who takes a unique interest in you, and shares all the circumstances of
life with you (the good times and the bad times alike). We need to belong, to
be wanted, and needed, and cherished, and loved, by another person in a very
special way. We want to be very important to someone else, another human being,
a person whom we in turn can care about, and want, and
need, and cherish, and love, and who will be very important to us. When a
husband and wife are able to give each other this kind of friendship, and
acceptance, and recognition, it gives a new, richer, dimension to life, and loneliness
is banished.
Moreover,
we have economic and material and practical needs. The person who is in the
position of living alone is well aware of these: the constant everyday problems
of the business of living, coping with the providing and taking care of the
requirements of food, clothing, and shelter, and the occasional special need or
sudden crisis such as accident or illness, loss of job, and so forth. Plus the
many times when it is simply a case of two heads (or pairs of hands) are better
than one. How great an advantage it is to have someone sharing life with us who
is there to help in all these matters, and in every
other kind of difficulty and problem as well. Someone who will give us support
and encouragement, and understanding sympathy, and practical help, when we need
it – and to whom we can give any or all of these things when they need it.
We have
other physical needs, too, of a different kind: sexual needs. This includes the
need for sexual intercourse, but it is much wider than that, for sex is a great
deal more than just the act of intercourse. It is also the lying close in the
bed at night and the consciousness of bodies touching in this togetherness even
when it does not go on to intercourse. It is the reunion after a period of separation,
and the tender loving caress, and the unexpected warm hug in the kitchen for no
particular reason, and holding hands staring together into the fire reliving
old memories, or planning the creation of new ones, and the exploratory toe
creeping out in the bed at night across no-man’s-land to make contact with the
other after some silly tiff has created a gulf between. It is the ongoing
knowledge of just belonging to another human being body and soul. Read more in
“Marriage and Divorce – the New Testament Teaching”. Click
here for information on ordering.
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THE NATURE
OF MARRIAGE AS TAUGHT IN THE BIBLE
By B Ward Powers
Marriage is
always presented in the Bible as a dynamic experience – something that is
happening, rather than just as a legal bond. It is that, of course, and a
covenantal relationship (Malachi 2:14). But the focus in the Bible is upon the
“togetherness” of marriage.
The
marriage relationship is forged by God for companionship, for mutual help, and
for the right satisfaction of the sexual nature which he has given to men and women.
We can see these three purposes clearly in the picture of Adam and Eve in the
Garden (Genesis 2:18-25). The bond of marriage is to be the closest of all
human bonds, closer even than that of parent and child – we leave our parents
to be joined to a spouse (Genesis 2:24).
Thus the
leaders of the early church (apart from Paul and Barnabas) were not only
married but were accompanied by these wives in their ministry (1 Corinthians
9:5). Aquila and Priscilla set us an example of joint
ministry, to Apollos in
Part of
this “togetherness” in Paul’s teaching was the giving of oneself to one’s
spouse in the sexual relationship of marriage, as Paul describes in 1
Corinthians 7:2-5. There are two aspects of this passage which are quite
remarkable and which we must not overlook. First of all, the evenhanded way Paul speaks of both the husband and the
wife: the sexual nature, and sexual needs, of the wife were normally quite
overlooked in the ancient world – this treatment of sex by Paul is unique in
the ancient world in showing a recognition of the wife
in this way.
Secondly,
Paul’s teaching focusses on the relationship aspect
of sex, without any reference to its role in procreation. Some Christians seem
to think that sex is solely for procreation, and otherwise is best avoided. Not
so. Paul writes here of the mutual giving of sexual love, and never even hints
at procreation. And the sexual relationship, Paul says, is not to be
discontinued except perhaps by agreement for a short period for some specific
reason (such as a special season of prayer); and then husband and wife are to
resume their normal sex life. The joyful “one-flesh” joining together in sexual
union was God’s intention in making us male and female (Genesis 2:24-25).
It is a matter of the greatest regret
when God’s plan for human marriage is not being experienced in a particular
relationship. What are we to say then? For a detailed consideration of this
(and a whole lot more), read “Marriage and Divorce – the New Testament
Teaching” by Rev Dr B Ward Powers (Jordan Books), 384 pages, posted for $AUD33,
or $US25, or £Stg15. Click here for information on ordering.
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THE ELEVEN VIEWS ABOUT DIVORCE AND
REMARRIAGE
By B Ward Powers
One of the
most controversial issues in the church is that of divorce and remarriage. I
have identified eleven different views which are (or have been) held in the
church. A tantalizing question is: how can so many teachers look at the same
passages in the Bible and come to so many different conclusions as to what they
mean? The explanation I have arrived at about this is a combination of two
factors.
Firstly, we
do not live in a vacuum, and when we come to look at the teaching of the
Scriptures we bring ideas and interpretations which we have heard or opinions
we have already half formed: and often we tend to see in the Bible what we
expect to see. Secondly, we can focus on selected Scriptures as being the most
basic and build our interpretation from them alone, assuming that those which
appear to differ from them imply the points we accept or are somehow secondary.
If we
really want to draw out the New Testament teaching on these issues, we must be
prepared to consider them afresh without being committed to one or another
point of view that we have heard or been taught, and moreover, to take the
entire teaching of the New Testament on these matters into account in forming
our interpretation.
One view I
accept. The other ten viewpoints fall into three groups:
(a) Total
Indissolubility Interpretation: No divorce is possible,
because the marriage continues in God’s eyes notwithstanding whatever we may
purport to do, so that remarriage after divorce is always adultery. [But this
interpretation involves selective obedience to the commands of Scripture, there
are fundamental inconsistencies at its heart, and it goes beyond the warrant of
Scripture. In fact, it succeeds in holding God and marriage up to ridicule.]
(b)
Specified Grounds Interpretation: This permits divorce (and remarriage) upon specified
grounds, which are accepted as exceptions to an overall rejection of divorce.
This group of views differ between themselves as to the acceptable grounds,
whether both parties or only the “innocent” one can
divorce, and whether remarriage is permitted. [But we need to face the fact
that no “exceptions” can make an evil thing good and acceptable to God.]
(c) Ideals And Guidelines Interpretation: These views regard the
teachings of Jesus and Paul as helpful guidelines, or an ideal to be striven
for, but a goal which is often unattainable, and towards which one can make
several attempts, with different partners. [But this is denying that Jesus
expected his followers to obey his teaching, or that the Scripture in general
has any authority.]
For the
view that fits what we find in Scripture, read “Marriage and Divorce – the New
Testament Teaching” by Rev Dr B Ward Powers (Jordan Books), 384 pages, posted
for $AUD33, or $US25, or £Stg15. Click here for information on
ordering.
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MARRIAGE,
DIVORCE, REMARRIAGE: SEEING BOTH LAW AND GRACE
By B Ward Powers
In the
teaching of the New Testament, the law of God is absolutely clear: one man, one
woman, for life. There are no exceptions to this in God’s will and plan for
human life. (Concerning so-called exceptions that many people think they find
in the Bible, see Divorce: the
non-existent exception.) Obviously God’s plan totally excludes divorce or
separation: Jesus said (Matthew 19:6//Mark 10:9), “What God has joined together
let no one split asunder.” Any splitting apart or sundering of the marriage
relationship, any separating of the partners, is contrary to the will of God,
and this is sin.
This is the
law of God. We need to recognize that a broken marriage is always wrong, always
contrary to the will of God. There is no such thing as a broken marriage that
is God’s will – a broken marriage is always, to varying extents and in
different ways, the
outcome of sin on the part of the marriage partners.
But this is
only part of the New Testament teaching. For the central theme of the New
Testament is that Jesus Christ the Son of God came into this world to save
sinners – to bring mankind the opportunity to receive forgiveness for all our
sin, and cleansing, and a fresh start. This is the grace of Christ at work in
our lives. Even as his people, we will fall – but still the grace of Christ is
extended to us to forgive and restore us again. All sin is forgivable (except
blasphemy against the Holy Spirit [Matthew 12:31], and a failed marriage –
though serious – is not this). If we recognize a failed marriage as sin, and
repent of our part in it (great or small), and confess it to the Lord, we are
forgiven, we are cleansed, we are justified, we are given a fresh start.
In our
thinking, in our teaching, we must never compromise the standards of God’s law:
one man, one woman, for life. There can be no exceptions to this, as if somehow
one sin (e.g., an act of unfaithfulness, or desertion, or anything else) can
somehow transform what is wrong and evil and against the plan of God (divorce)
into something good and acceptable to the will of God. “I hate divorce,” says
the Lord, the God of Israel (Malachi 2:16), and no act of sin by marriage
partners is going to change this fact. That is the unchanging law of God.
But when we
fail and fall, and when we then face the fact that a broken marriage is the
outcome of sin, and we come before the Lord in repentance about this, he meets
us with grace and mercy. We will find forgiveness and cleansing in Christ, for
God’s grace extends to those who have been involved in, and have contributed to,
a broken marriage as much as to those involved in any other kind of sin.
However, Christians must stop pretending that there are various “exceptions”
which allow us to do what God says he hates, as if somehow it isn’t sin
anymore.
What does
this mean for a Christian, in practical terms? For a detailed explanation about
this (and a whole lot more), read “Marriage and Divorce – the New Testament
Teaching” by Rev Dr B Ward Powers (Jordan Books), 384 pages, posted $33
Australian, or $25 US, or £15 STG. Click here for information
on ordering.
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THE
QUESTION OF GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE
By B Ward Powers
What does
the Bible teach about grounds for divorce? The Old Testament teaching is found
in the Mosaic Law in Deuteronomy 24:1-4. This reads (NIV), “If a man marries a woman
who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her,
and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from
his house, and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another
man, and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of
divorce, gives it to her, and sends her from his house, or if he dies, then her
first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she
has been defiled. That would be detestable in the eyes of the Lord.”
The RSV
rendering of the latter part of v.1 is, “if then she
finds no favour in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her …”
“Something indecent”, “some indecency” is a very general term meaning some kind
of sexual misbehaviour, without being specific. It leaves open a measure of
discretion as to how it is to be interpreted. It has a much wider meaning than
just “adultery”. In consequence, in New Testament times there were differing
views amongst the Jews about acceptable grounds for divorce.
And this is
what lies behind the situation in Matthew 19:3, where the Pharisees confront
Jesus with their question. They are asking him for his interpretation about
these grounds for divorce in the Law of Moses. It is, as Matthew points out, a
trick question: they are putting him to the test. Whichever way he answered
(they reasoned), he would alienate himself with that part of the crowd which
held a different view, and they would thus involve him in this divorce
controversy.
The three
Jewish views are set out in the Talmud (Mishnah Gittin
9:10, translation of Leo Auerbach), “The House of Shammai
says: A man must not divorce his wife unless he has found her unfaithful. As
was said (Deuteronomy 24:1), `Because he hath found
some uncleanness in her’. The House of Hillel says:
He may divorce her if she only spoiled a dish for him because it was said:
uncleanness is anything. Rabbi Akiba says: He may
divorce her if he found another that is more beautiful than his wife, because
it was said (Deuteronomy 24:1), `If it comes to pass
that she find no favour in his eyes’.”
Jesus
answers them by returning to God’s original purpose in marriage (Genesis 1:27;
2:24), in which divorce has no place at all. The Pharisees refer to Deuteronomy
24. Jesus says that Moses’s “permission” for divorce
was because of their hardheartedness – but they are approving divorce, not even
when the wife is guilty of some sexual misbehaviour (as per Moses), but so they
can marry another woman (the Akiba view): and changing
from one woman to another in this way is adultery.
In Christ’s
teaching there are NO acceptable grounds for divorce, because this is contrary
to God’s will, and sinful. For details, see “Marriage and Divorce – the New
Testament Teaching” by Rev Dr B Ward Powers (Jordan Books), 384 pages, posted
$33 Australian, or $25 US, or £15 STG. Click here for
information on ordering.
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DIVORCE
IN THE NEW TESTAMENT: THE NON-EXISTENT EXCEPTION
By B Ward Powers
Jesus
Christ taught God’s basic pattern for marriage: one man, one woman, for life.
There is no place in this for divorce or separation (Matthew 19:6//Mark 10:9).
That is the law of God. But people imagine they have found exceptions to this,
“grounds” which make divorce “acceptable” to God, no longer contrary to the
will of God, and therefore “permissible” and not sin: adultery by one of the
partners.
The ground
of adultery is derived from an interpretation of Matthew 19:9, where the NIV
says, “Anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and
marries another woman commits adultery.” The NRSV reads, “except for
unchastity”.
So (it
would appear) what Jesus said about divorce plus remarriage being adultery has
an exception (which presumably then makes this divorce and remarriage
permissible): if the wife has been guilty of “marital unfaithfulness”, “unchastity”.
There is
one thing terribly wrong with this interpretation: the Scripture does NOT say
that Jesus said “except”. In translations like this it would appear that Jesus
is talking about the situation when the wife is guilty of “marital unfaithfulness”.
But this is a rendering of the original Greek text to make the translation fit
the translators’ interpretation. The Greek word being rendered as “except” is
“me”, the ordinary word for “not”, occurring in the New Testament more than
1,000 times and not once rendered by the NIV as “except” - except in this one case!
Jesus is
NOT excusing or allowing divorce and remarriage when the wife has been guilty
of unchastity. He is talking about the EXACT OPPOSITE: when she is NOT guilty. Note
that Jesus is in dispute with the Pharisees about grounds for divorce (the
issue they raised with him), and the immediate context (Matthew 19:7-8) is a
discussion of the Mosaic law (found in Deuteronomy
24:1-4), which provided for divorce on the ground of “something indecent” on
the part of the wife. Jesus is saying that this was permitted by Moses in the
law because of their hardheartedness, but this was not God’s will and intention
when he created mankind. However, the Pharisees were allowing divorce when the
wife was NOT guilty of unchastity (as set out in Deuteronomy 24:1), but rather,
the man wanted to marry someone else who had attracted him. To change from one
woman to another in this way, Jesus states, is adulterous behaviour. That is,
changing women has not ceased to be adulterous behaviour because it gets
camouflaged behind a veneer of legal niceties – a formal divorce and a formal
remarriage.
This
correct meaning can be seen in the Good News Bible translation of Matthew 19:9,
“Any man who divorces his wife, even though she has
not been unfaithful, commits adultery if he marries some other woman.” For a
detailed explanation about this (and a whole lot more), read “Marriage and
Divorce – the New Testament Teaching” by Rev Dr B Ward Powers (Jordan Books),
384 pages, posted $33 Australian, or $25 US, or £15 STG. Click
here for information on ordering.
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MAKING
YOUR WIFE AN ADULTERESS: JESUS’S TEACHING
By B Ward Powers
Jesus is
not providing an exception which makes a bad thing permissible. That is not
what he is saying at all. He is telling the Pharisees that the concession
reluctantly allowed by Moses in the law was a falling short of God’s plan in
the beginning – and the Pharisees in their teaching are even allowing divorce
when a wife has not been guilty (contrary to Moses), but because they want to
marry someone else. And turning from one woman to another is adultery.
Does this
word of Jesus condemn ALL remarriage, in ALL circumstances, as adultery? What
about Matthew 5:32? Oh yes, and what about desertion? For a detailed
explanation about this (and a whole lot more), read “Marriage and Divorce – the
New Testament Teaching” by Rev Dr B Ward Powers (Jordan Books), 384 pages,
posted $33 Australian, or $25 US, or £15 STG. Click here for
information on ordering.
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DOES
JESUS TEACH IT IS ADULTERY FOR A DIVORCEE TO REMARRY?
By B Ward Powers
Does Jesus teach
that it is adultery for a divorcee to remarry? “Clearly yes he does,” some
people will say. “At least twice. If a someone who is divorced (Jesus says) is to marry again,
they are committing adultery. Very clear teaching.”
Let us look
at the passages on which this view is based. One of these occasions we find
recorded in Matthew 19:9//Mark 10:11//Luke 16:18. The context here (which
Matthew and Luke give in detail) is a dispute of Jesus with the Pharisees. They
had asked Jesus about grounds for divorce, a contentious issue at the time. The
Jewish Talmud (Mishnah Gittin 9:10) tells us there
were three views, those of Shammai (who allowed
divorce also for a wife’s adultery), Hillel (who
allowed it for any misdeed by the wife, however minor), and Akiba
(who required no fault at all by the wife, but approved it if a man had found
someone else he preferred to his wife). Jesus replies that the marriage
relationship must never be sundered by any person for any reason.
The
Pharisees persist, pointing to Moses’s teaching in
the Law (Deuteronomy 24:1-4). Jesus answers that they are
allowing divorce not because the wife has been guilty of “some unchastity” (as
in Deuteronomy 24), but in order to marry another woman. And THAT is
what Jesus names as adultery: not all remarriage, but a deliberate getting rid
of one woman to take another.
The other
instance is in Matthew 5:32, which says that if a husband divorces his wife he
makes her an adulteress. It is very glibly assumed that a divorced woman would
be forced to marry again, and that Jesus is calling this second marriage
adulterous. But a divorced woman would have several options open to her, and it
is far from certain that she would so readily find someone else she could
marry. Other options were to return to her parents’ home (following the lead of
Leviticus 22:13), to go to live with a married brother or other relative, or to
live independently (somewhat difficult but far from impossible and far from
unknown). Indeed, she would have much the same choices as a widow.
But those
who assume she is an adulteress because she remarries are not paying careful
enough attention to what the text actually says. This is that anyone who
divorces his wife makes her an adulteress. It is THE DIVORCING, not anything
she may do subsequently, that causes this. Thus all
the women who were divorced (whether they subsequently remarried or not) are
categorized as “adulteress”. And “makes her an adulteress” is the passive of
the verb “to commit adultery” – this is something that is being done to her by
the action of a heartless husband, NOT something she is doing. Bear in mind
that the grounds for divorce in the Law were when the wife was guilty of “some
sexual misbehaviour”. What is meant then is that she is stigmatized as an
“adulteress” in the eyes of society when she is thus divorced. There is an
exception: if she has in fact committed sexual misbehaviour she has brought
this reputation upon herself.
Concerning
this question (and a whole lot more), read “Marriage and Divorce – the New
Testament Teaching” by Rev Dr B Ward Powers (Jordan Books), 384 pages, posted
$33 Australian, or $25 US, or £15 STG. Click here for
information on ordering.
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THE LESSER OF TWO EVILS WHEN YOU ARE BOUND TO A SPOUSE.
By B Ward Powers
Didn’t the
apostle Paul say that a wife was bound to her husband as long as he lives? Yes,
indeed he did. He says this quite clearly in Romans 7:1-2. Notice the setting
of this discussion: Paul specifically states that he is quoting what the Jewish
law says. And the law did not permit a woman to divorce her husband. That is
the point for which Paul is using this as an illustration. Similarly in 1
Corinthians 7:39: a wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. It would
not have been accurate to put this the other way around, and make this
statement about the husband, because that was not the case: he was always able
under the law to initiate a divorce.
But note
that such a splitting up of the marriage relationship is not part of God’s plan
for human marriage. It is always the result and the outcome of human sinfulness.
It is never God’s will that two people should marry and then should split up.
The marriage relationship is forged by God for companionship, for mutual help,
and for the right satisfaction of the sexual nature which he has given to men
and women. We can see this clearly in the picture of Adam and Eve in the Garden
(Genesis 2:18-25). See also Paul’s teaching regarding the role of sex in
marriage in 1 Corinthians 7:2-5. The bond of marriage is to be the closest of
all human bonds, closer even than that of parent and child (Genesis 2:24).
But we are
frail, fallible, flawed creatures, and things do not always work out in
accordance with God’s design and intentions. Sometimes, because of the way that
sin can disrupt a relationship, the marriage – which in God’s intention is to
be the closest and most intimate and most exciting and wonderful of bonds –
becomes close to a hell on earth. We must work hard to see that this does not
happen. Good marriages are the result of purpose and intention and effort on the
part of both partners, and a marriage that works well
is very rewarding and well worth the effort that it takes. A major problem
today is that too many people have exaggerated ideas of what they are to get
out of marriage, and an inadequate commitment to what they themselves are to
put in. The moment that some difficulty arises, some difference of opinion or
some problem that puts the relationship under strain, they are too ready to
walk away from it and seek a divorce. Thus they surrender the richness and the
benefit that the Lord intended them to receive from committing themselves to
that relationship in good times and bad.
However,
situations arise that put the relationship – and,
sometimes, the safety or wellbeing of one (or both) of the partners - under
intolerable stress. What then?
Firstly, we
should identify this whole situation as sin. The cause and nature of the sin
that threatens a marriage can be as varied as we are as individual human
beings, but the response should be to identify that sin, and put it right. This
requires the consent and the effort of both partners. If this does not happen –
if sin continues to disrupt the marriage – then it may be that the continuation
of the marriage is not possible. We must be very slow to come to such a decision,
but sometimes come to it we must. (E.g., gross cruelty by one of the marriage
partners to the other.) A broken marriage is always an evil: but sometimes it
may be the lesser of two evils.
Concerning
this question (and a whole lot more), read “Marriage and Divorce – the New
Testament Teaching” by Rev Dr B Ward Powers (Jordan Books), 384 pages, posted
$33 Australian, or $25 US, or £15 STG. Click here for
information on ordering.
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WHEN
IS IT PERMISSIBLE FOR YOU TO CUT OFF YOUR LEG?
By B Ward Powers
Sometimes people
ask, “When is it permissible to end a marriage?” They are seeking a list of
“acceptable grounds”. This is to misunderstand the situation.
If someone
says to you, “When is it permissible for me to cut off my leg?” how would you
answer? From one point of view it is ALWAYS permissible – you can do it right
now, if you choose – but it is a drastic thing to do and you would only
contemplate it in the most extreme of circumstances, when the alternative is
(for some reason) even worse. This is how we are to view splitting a marriage
relationship. Husband and wife have become “one flesh”, one entity in the
purpose of God. You do not lightly terminate this “one flesh” relationship. and you should only contemplate it in the most extreme of
circumstances, when the alternative is (for some reason) even worse.
Then you do
it with regret and humility, and a sense of failure, throwing yourself upon the
grace and mercy of the Lord. Too many marriages – yes, even between Christians
– are being ended lightheartedly, apparently without
any real sense of awareness of how serious a thing this is to do. A broken
marriage can be the lesser of two evils. It may thus be the best thing to do in
the circumstances. But let us never pretend it is a good thing,
that it is anything but an evil, a desperate thing to do.
God in his
grace and mercy can forgive a repentant heart, and grant a fresh start, even
after divorce.
Concerning
this question (and a whole lot more), read “Marriage and Divorce – the New
Testament Teaching” by Rev Dr B Ward Powers (Jordan Books), 384 pages, posted
$33 Australian, or $25 US, or £15 STG. Click here for
information on ordering.
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HOW
LONG DOES PAUL SAY A DIVORCEE MUST REMAIN UNMARRIED?
By B Ward Powers
The
teaching of the Bible is very clear. In 1 Corinthians 7:10-11 the apostle Paul
discusses the situation where a woman breaks up with her husband, and instructs
that such a person who has had a broken marriage must “remain unmarried”.
The first
thing to note is that after the break-up of her marriage she is described as
being “unmarried”. The marriage has ended. The marriage is over. There is no
idea here of the teaching of some Christians that “once married, always
married”, until death shall part you, i.e. that God does not recognize human
divorce but that the two of you continue married in God’s eyes even though you
may not have seen each other in years. That is not what the biblical teaching
about marriage is.
In his
teaching here, the apostle Paul is completely in accord with the teaching of Jesus.
In John 4:16-18 the Samaritan woman says that she has no husband, and Jesus
agrees with her. He says that she has had five husbands in the past and though
she is now living with another man he is not her husband. Jesus does not say
that this woman is still married to her first husband and that the others are
just adulterous relationships – which would be the situation if Jesus held that
God ignored human divorce and “once married, always married” till death.
So the
woman of whom Paul is speaking is unmarried. Thus remarriage is possible. It is
FORBIDDEN, but it is POSSIBLE.
Paul says
she is to REMAIN unmarried. The question is, for how long?
For many
people, this is not really a serious question at all. The answer is totally
obvious: it is for the rest of her earthly life. Or at least
until the death of her former husband, if he were to predecease her.
Many Christians, interpreting the verse like this, have turned away (in
obedience, they believe, to the instructions of Scripture) from any possibility
of marrying again and creating afresh a Christian family and maybe having a
father figure for their children (if they have any).
But if we
take a careful look at this verse we will see the reason why she is to remain
unmarried. It is in hopes of a reconciliation with her
former husband. This is the much-to-be-desired outcome of a bad situation. If
she were to marry someone else, then according to the Scripture (Deuteronomy
24:4) this possibility becomes closed off. But realistically, in the vast
majority of cases it would be quite clear within a relatively short time
whether there was any genuine possibility of finding a basis for
reconciliation.
If she has
sought to be able to achieve reconciliation, and it is clear that this is not
going to happen, then she has done precisely what Paul instructed in 1
Corinthians 7:11. So she is now in the situation in 7:8, a verse which is
addressed expressly to the unmarried, the agamoi (to
use the Greek word) – which is exactly the same word which Paul uses to describe
her in 7:11. So now she is to do what Paul instructs in 7:8-9. What will that
mean for her?
For a detailed explanation about this (and a
whole lot more), read “Marriage and Divorce – the New Testament Teaching” by
Rev Dr B Ward Powers (Jordan Books), 384 pages, posted $33 Australian, or $25
US, or £15 STG. Click here for information on ordering.
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CAN A
CHRISTIAN DIVORCEE EVER REMARRY? WHEN?
By B Ward Powers
To this
question some teachers give a straightforward “No! Not during the life of their
former partner.” To marry again (they say) would be to commit adultery – and
they cite the teaching of Jesus in Mark 10:11 for this. “In certain limited
circumstances,” others say, “if the person is the innocent party, and the other
party has committed adultery or has deserted.”
What does
Scripture say? In 1 Corinthians 7:8 the apostle Paul specifically addresses
those who are agamos, a Greek word which means “not
at present married”, but does not imply “never been married”, and is used by
Paul (7:11) in reference to a person who has had a broken marriage, and (7:34)
to differentiate a woman who has been (and no longer is) married from a virgin,
a person who has never been married.
Thus Paul’s
comment in 7:8 has primarily in view those who are widowed, and those who are
divorced. His first comment to them is that it is well for them to remain as he
is – and he is not married (9:5). But he has just, in the preceding verse (7:7)
pointed out to them that it is God’s gift for some people to live complete and
fulfilled lives as single, without marrying, but to other people for them to be
marriage partners. What he goes on now to say to those whose previous marriage
has ended (for whatever reason) is that, if after seeking to live like him as a
single person they find that this is not their gift and they are not managing
self-control, then the right thing for them to do is to marry, which is better
than continuing to be aflame with passion (7:9).
This is a
realistic recognition of the nature with which God has endowed us, from the
beginning. He said of Adam in Genesis 2:18, “It is not good for a man to be
alone. And what is said of the man here is true also of a woman. And it does
not cease to be true after a marriage has ended. Undoubtedly some people, now
finding themselves single, are content to remain so –
they have now the gift of singleness and celibacy to which Paul referred in
7:7. But for many others this is not the case: and Paul’s word to all such
people (totally without reference to HOW they became agamos,
whether through widowing or divorce) is, “they should marry”. Often in the
English translations of Paul’s words this looks like permission, or advice. It
is all that, but it is more. In the Greek it is an imperative. It is an
instruction to people in such circumstances: they are to marry, they must
marry. This is the answer for them in their situation. God said to Adam
(Genesis 2:18), “I will provide a partner for him” – and sometimes he does also
for those who become agamos.
Then in
7:25-28 Paul speaks of the distress facing the Corinthian church at that time (apparently,
the beginning of persecutions), and counsels virgins to remain as they are in
this period. He adds, If you are married, do not seek
a divorce; if you have been divorced, do not seek a new wife. But if you do
marry, this is not a sin, and it is not a sin if a virgin marries. Some
translations do not make it clear enough that the “you” that Paul is speaking
of here is a divorcee; for a clearer translation here, see the
This is an
express statement by Paul that if a divorcee were to remarry, this is not a
sin. Like to look at this in more detail? For a
detailed explanation about this (and a whole lot more), read “Marriage and
Divorce – the New Testament Teaching” by Rev Dr B Ward Powers (Jordan Books),
384 pages, posted $33 Australian, or $25 US, or £15 STG. Click
here for information on ordering.
[Click here to return to topic list.]
[Click to return to the Home
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SHOULD
A DIVORCEE EVERY REMARRY IN CHURCH? WHY?
By B Ward Powers
Some will
say emphatically, “Most definitely not! You took vows before God `Till death do
us part’ with another partner, and you broke them! You can’t expect to come
into the presence of God now and take this vow again – with a different
person!” Others will reluctantly permit it, if it is done quietly, “on the sly”
as it were. Yet others will allow it for the “innocent party” – if that person
can be identified! In practice in many places the church’s policy is based on
an assessment of what were the grounds of the divorce, and whether this
complies with an “acceptable” list of “approved grounds”. What this means is
that if your marriage break-up was for one (or more) of the “right” reasons,
you can get married again in church; otherwise not.
Usually the
opposition to remarriage is based on the interpretation of Scripture that
remarriage of a divorcee is adulterous, and so that by performing the wedding
ceremony the church is conniving at –
worse, aiding and abetting – the committing of adultery. My book looks in
careful detail at the presumed basis for such teaching and shows that (apart
from the special circumstances which Jesus describes in Matthew 19:9//Mark
10:11//Luke 16:18), this is not the case.
The danger
that we face, especially as ministers and pastors of the church of God, is
that, in registering our disapproval of separation and divorce, and seeking to
uphold the high standards of Christ for marriage, we end up behaving is a very unChristlike fashion towards divorcees who are seeking,
under God, to build a new life. As one divorcee said to me, “I have repented,
and I know that Jesus has forgiven me: but the church never will!”
We must
take account of Jesus’s attitude of forgiveness in
John 8:1-11. The woman was guilty and merited punishment. But by his challenge
to the people, Jesus showed that we humans are not qualified or equipped to be
the ones to punish. Then Jesus demonstrated the divine response of forgiveness.
When we ourselves encounter a situation of marriage failure, do we accept the
invitation to take up the stones to throw, or do we follow the example of
Jesus?
Note that
this is not to condone the sin or lower the standard of God’s righteousness. We
must not take a tolerant view of separation, divorce, and remarriage, making it
seem a small or light matter. But when there are reasonable grounds for
believing that the divorcee takes a serious view of the breakdown of the first
marriage, and has genuinely repented of his/her part in it, and wishes to ask
God’s blessing on a new relationship, how does it help
at all if we say, “Not in church!” Whoever they are and whatever their
circumstances, the vows will inevitably be more meaningful if publicly they
take them before God, accompanied by the prayers of minister and congregation.
For further
discussion about this (and a whole lot more), read “Marriage and Divorce – the
New Testament Teaching” by Rev Dr B Ward Powers (Jordan Books) 384 pages,
posted $33 Australian, or $25 US, or £15 Stg. Click here for information on ordering.
[Click here to return to topic list.]
[Click to return to the Home
Page.]